Monday, March 17, 2008
You Know You're (A Student) In Paris When...
You know you're a student in Paris when...
1- White out is your best friend; and you bought a bottle of it for every purse you own, and one to keep in the room - just in case.
2- You have a French-English and/or a French-French dictionary with you at all times.
3- Everyone can hear that you're mispronouncing the sound of "u" and "ou" and sees fit to try to correct you.
4- Your roommate can't understand you because you can't pronounce the difference between "u" and "ou"
5- Your professor has very specific instruction about the size, width, length, type. etc of paper your homework must be turned in on if you want it graded.
6- You're not sure you want it graded.
7- Grades are based on a scale of 20. 20 is NOT attainable. Only God can earn a 20. No one can earn a 19. 19 is the space in-between God and the professor. The professor (and only the professor) can earn an 18. 17 is the space between the professor and the student. Thus, 16 is the highest a student can attain. Ever.
8- You avoid words with the letter "r." A problem when that's the first letter of your first name.
9- Class exposés are frequently given over alcoholic drinks. So much so, that your professor accuses the class of being alcoholic.
10- The sandwich man (the only French man in Paris who hasn't hit on you at least once) tells you the best way to learn French is to date a French man and offers to go get one for you, adding, "Les hommes français sont très bon, mais pas très fidèle." (French men are very good, but not very faithful.)
11- You go to the cinema and understand everything except the jokes; which you only know are jokes because everyone else laughed.
12- You learn swears by watching TV. You learn that they're swears by asking someone what they mean.
13- English is Weird.