You Know You're (A Student) In Paris When...

As promised...

You know you're a student in Paris when...

1- White out is your best friend; and you bought a bottle of it for every purse you own, and one to keep in the room - just in case.

2- You have a French-English and/or a French-French dictionary with you at all times.

3- Everyone can hear that you're mispronouncing the sound of "u" and "ou" and sees fit to try to correct you.

4- Your roommate can't understand you because you can't pronounce the difference between "u" and "ou"

5- Your professor has very specific instruction about the size, width, length, type. etc of paper your homework must be turned in on if you want it graded.

6- You're not sure you want it graded.

7- Grades are based on a scale of 20. 20 is NOT attainable. Only God can earn a 20. No one can earn a 19. 19 is the space in-between God and the professor. The professor (and only the professor) can earn an 18. 17 is the space between the professor and the student. Thus, 16 is the highest a student can attain. Ever.

8- You avoid words with the letter "r." A problem when that's the first letter of your first name.

9- Class exposés are frequently given over alcoholic drinks. So much so, that your professor accuses the class of being alcoholic.

10- The sandwich man (the only French man in Paris who hasn't hit on you at least once) tells you the best way to learn French is to date a French man and offers to go get one for you, adding, "Les hommes français sont très bon, mais pas très fidèle." (French men are very good, but not very faithful.)

11- You go to the cinema and understand everything except the jokes; which you only know are jokes because everyone else laughed.

12- You learn swears by watching TV. You learn that they're swears by asking someone what they mean.

13- English is Weird.

You Know You're In Paris When...

Yesterday,I found a list made while in France of all the crazy things that happened in Paris. Some of them are more along the lines of "You know you're a student in Paris when..." so I have two separate sections.

You Know You're In Paris When...

1) A policeman glances at you, standing sopping wet in the pouring rain, looks you over, nods his head, then proceeds to stop traffic for you that you might finally cross the road.

2) A really scary guy tells you you're beautiful, and then proceeds to ask why you're not married, if you have a boyfriend, and where exactly you live in the U.S.

3) You don't look at a guy unless you're interested. In other words, you don't look at a guy, because if you do, he'll think you're interested.

4) People driving on the sidewalk honk at you to get out of the way

5) An old lady hits the car in front of hers, get out of her car, checks for damage, gets back in and does exactly the same thing.

6) It takes 20 minutes to leave because you have to kiss everybody goodbye.

7) You don't worry about being late because it's more than likely the other person will also be late, and they're thinking exactly the same thing about you.

8) It starts to rain and everyone promptly a-pulls out an umbrella, b-runs for the nearest store or c - backs against a wall - all at the same time.

9) It makes sense to list the price of everything in both Euros and Francs - even though Francs are not accepted. Anywhere.

10) When you enter the Metro expecting it to smell like someone just peed, but are surprised when it does, but not at all surprised to see someone peeing in front of you.

11) You see a man painted in green wearing a blue thong.

12) You see another man painted in green wearing a blue thong. This one is drinking a Heineken.

13) The first man painted green wearing a blue song notices you looking at him and thinks you're interested.

14) You find yourself eating peanuts, nutella and a clementine for breakfast and are not surprised.

15) You're surprised when there is meat and bread at a picnic, but not surprised by the champagne.

16) All around you, people are talking to themselves - constantly

17) You find yourself joining in...

18) You have addresses from people you've only met one time.

19) When a man asks you for help what he really wants to know is if you have a boyfriend

20) You tell yourself never to go somewhere, say something, or do something again, and within one week...


Tomorrow, look for "You Know You're a Student In Paris When..."

Paris

I miss Europe so much. Talking to a friend on AIM just makes me miss it more. I miss the old buildings, the people, the bustling, the roads, and the efficient transportation system.
Ironically, I even miss not being able to smile because someone will inevitably take it the wrong way.
One day, in my phonetics class in Paris, we were discussing terms for different buildings and things. Somehow, the class got distracted (this only happened about once a day or so), and someone was asking about building in Paris, and she explained how there are no buildings built within the confines of Paris (currently) for various reasons. Someone pointed at the building across the street from us, and commented on how old and majestic it was. She laughed, "That? That buildings only 300 years old! It's young! Not even worth talking about!" The Americans in the room looked at one another guiltily, feeling stupid.